Recently, I had to make some very difficult decisions...
Being completely honest, and with the best interests of our family name and reputation in mind, it has to be said, some keelings will be, alas.... unfit for battle. There I've said it. And I know it will be upsetting for some of you to be rejected from the Keeling XI, but allow me to console you. (I'm really talking to the younger keeling grandchildren and the keeling women). Really, you will be laughing when you see our opponents, laughing with happiness that you will NOT have to form up against some pretty formidable giants in, what we call, the bully. Another, reason you might be more able to accept rejection is that we do want to put out as physically strong a team as we possibly can, and I reckon that any keeling man is strong enough... just. And as the great French writer and physician, Louise Celine, once said...
"All great innovations are built on rejections."
So please dont be disheartened if you are not quite big enough yet or are the wrong sex. Am I being sexist? Well, I just quoted a French lady so pipe down any feminists out there.
Also another point that Tom Keeling, the older (or elder?), wisely brought up is the issue of showers after the game and football boots. Well basically we might be able to use the football pavilion showers, but I have not really done anything about that yet. And with regard to boots, yes I think I probably could rustle up several pairs but really you would be much better prepared in digging out an old pair or going buying some for £20/£30. But we can cross that bridge on the day.
The game kicks off at 11.00. but I think that all players (not necessarily supporters) should be there at literally 9am. this is because you are essentially re-learning (or in some cases just learning) a game that our opponents will have been practising for the whole term. and we'll need quite a few people in order to demonstrate easily what is supposed to be going on for people that need to know.
I am really going to start properly recruiting in about 3 weekends time when I'm at home and I've got more time to think and do stuff. So if you have been sitting by the phone all this time waiting for my call then alas I'm afraid you must wait a little while longer!
Lastly, I know that everyone's feeling quite pessimistic about actually playing but let me assure that no matter how crippled you think you are I garauntee you will enjoy thrill of playing this sport! Also, we are playing the 4th XI and I really believe that we can be better than them and are more capable of beating them. Remember that most of them will probably be fat and unfit and probably hung over, and none of them will be that great sportsmen. and even if we dont win, who cares, its just a great way to celebrate granny's 80th!
lots of love,
With a pep talk like that, how can we fail to beat them. Go Captain Archie!
From Cheerleader #1
Posted by: ruth | October 03, 2008 at 02:57 PM
Archie, Great update and yes we have crossed in the post, sort of. Wily and cunning we shall be versus raw youth and the spoils will be ours! On the hangover note that you made...if you arrange a bash at Tap the night before the match for the 4th XI then we may have that clear-headed advantage over them that could bring victory to the family team. Does Tap still exist?
Posted by: Tom | October 03, 2008 at 10:01 AM